Monday, February 9, 2009

Week Twenty-four

Does anybody really believe in "global warming"? I mean come on, it's got to be a myth. Like "economic downturn" or "yawning is contagious", nobody actually really believes any of this liberal-fed gobbledygook. Well, those Silicon Valley nerds might in fact have been on to something.

Saturday was the hottest day in the history of everything. The temperature in Melbourne reached 46.4 degrees Celsius (that's over 115 F), which for Don is the equivalent of about 17.8 layers of deodorant. In case you're curious, here is the formula I am using:

The Don Takaya Deoderant Quotient

When the temperature is below 14 degrees Celsius, I am technically ok without deodorant. When the temperature is between 14.1 and 19.1 I need one layer of deodorant. When the temperature is between 19.1 and 21.6 I need two layers. When the temperature is between 21.6 and 23.6 I need three layers. Anything above 23.6 gets calculated at [one layer for every 1.65 degrees through 35 degrees], and [one layer for every 1.45 degrees above 35 degrees].

As such, the formula for Saturday's DTDQ is as follows: 1 + 1 + 1 + 6.91 + 7.86 = 17.77 layers of Deoderant. And no, the type of deoderant, the time of day applied, nor the number of minutes following a shower all do not factor into this equation. Equation trademarked.

In the country, the hot weather fueled by hot and dry winds, similar to Orange County's Santa Ana winds, resulted in Victoria's worst bushfires since Ash Wednesday. In fact, the bushfires have since gripped the entire nation, and tens of thousands have already donated $7 million to the Red Cross. Unbenknownst to the fact there were fires going on in the distance, I spent the day ironically enough, firing up the barbie for a barbecue. Apparently Swedes don't believe in "fire bans".

I also spent Saturday watching Slumdog Millionaire, an award-winning film that brought up many important issues, including the gentrification of Mumbai, the religious hostility between Hindus and Muslims, and how/why I had never before heard of Freida Pinto, the hottest female in the history of everything. Needless to say I spent much of Saturday night'ing "Freida Pinto", for research purposes for this blog.

On Sunday I attended the St Kilda Festival, the largest patronised, free music festival in the Southern Hemisphere. Approximately 300,000 attended the day-long street event in my hometown, and it was quite a spectacle. And of course, on Sunday night I resumed my pictorial search of Freida Pinto.

Well, five and a half months in Australia and I finished my first week at Edelman. After only five days I can already tell how different Edelman is from B-M, and how different my role and my responsibilities will be from my previous job. They're doing a lot of cool things at Edelman, and even though my Friday was spent in non-casual attire, without a morning fruit basket, and contained no Happy Hour wine nor chips, the level of projects and programs I'm working on make the hours in the cube pass by with ease. There's even a little cafe downstairs in the courtyard that sells ice cold Diet Cokes, and it only took three days for the cashier to pick up on my DC addiction. So Happy Black History Month Jasmine, and Happy Valentines Day mom!!! :( I still need a girlfriend. Twenty-four weeks down, 28 to go.

Week Twenty-three Summary:
Weather: Finally starting to cool down, but still too hot for suits
New observation: Holidays are much more fun than workdays
New activity(ies): electronic roulette (stupid electronic roulette) :(
New food: 4-day old dim sum (it was on sale)
New word(s): "the" in front of sports. i.e. "I'm going to watch the tennis" or "We're going to the cricket."
New people: new colleagues at Edelman, half of whom are pregnant
What I miss: George W. Bush's foreign policy expertise, Syracuse defense, cheap fruit, Del Taco on a Tuesday night, Safeway online grocery delivery (the best way to get 144 cans of Diet Coke to a third floor apartment).

1 comment:

Dylan Malloch said...

Yep - the fact that we had hot weather for one day during summer is a real smoking gun for global warming, eh?